10 reasons NOT to become the other woman

If you are a single lady, refuse at all costs to become the other woman. You should know by now that married men are off limits, and yet many of us still find ourselves caught in nasty affairs that only leave us hurt and broken.


A picture for reasons not to become the other woman


You’ll remember that a simple healthy lifestyle requires healthy relationships.

But being the other woman is anything but healthy. It’s never a good idea. The man has a wife for goodness’ sake.

He’s unavailable, no matter how much time you spend with him or how much he tells you he loves you.

I’m not judging you here. I’ve been misled into having affairs with married men before. Yes. Not a married man but married men. That’s a mistake I’ll never repeat.

It’s easy to continue an affair because a married man will promise you things in such a way that you believe every word he says.

Not necessarily because you are a gullible person. Well, they bring out the gullibility in even the strongest of women.

But it’s mostly because you’ve made yourself vulnerable to him and by agreeing to the affair in the first place, you displayed your desperation and now he’s playing on it.

Now here are the 10 reasons not to become the other woman:


  • Reason #1: He’s not trustworthy

He’s cheating on his wife with you. Why on earth would you want to give yourself to a man like that?

If you are hoping he’ll leave his wife for you, and he does, you’ll have lost because he can never stay faithful to you.

So, refuse to settle for becoming the other woman. Find a single man who’ll love you and make you his wife.


  • Reason #2: He doesn’t love you

I don’t care what he’s been telling you all along. A married man loves his wife. You are just a pastime for him.

I know what you are thinking. That you think he’s genuine about his love for you. Believe me, he’s not. He’s just taking advantage of you.

Prepare to free yourself by reading how to avoid being taken advantage of in relationships.

It’s always the other woman who gets the short end of the stick when it comes to love. Refuse that.


  • Reason #3: He’ll never leave his wife for you

It’s all a lie when he keeps telling you he’s going to leave his wife for you as soon as this or that happens. As soon as the kids are grown, as soon as the mortgage is paid off, etc.

A married man will not leave his wife for you. Leave him and open yourself to being genuinely loved by a man who’s available, who treats you as his first lady and not the other woman.


  • Reason #4: If he does leave his wife for you, you’ll never be happy

Would you be happy with a man who was unfaithful to his ex-wife? Every time he leaves the house, you’ll be wondering where he’s going. Is that how you want to live?

You can’t build a life with a man who married you out of his unfaithfulness. You as the other woman knows what he got up to when he wasn’t home, so how can you have peace of mind now as his wife?

There might not be anything sinister about his whereabouts when you are married. Maybe he’s genuinely working late. But would you believe that?

Why would you settle for that kind of stress in your life? I recommend live stress free with these 10 great tips.

People who enjoy a simple healthy lifestyle are supposed to be happy. Know that and claim your happiness by reading 17 simple things you must do to become happier.


  • Reason #5: He makes you love yourself less

And that’s a big no no. Being the other woman will bring your self-esteem and self-love crushing down.

How can it not when you got the man out of evil intentions? And when you know you are his second, third, fourth…choice.

If you are serious about enjoying a simple healthy lifestyle, then you know you have to love yourself enough to be able to extend that love to others. Being the other woman will make that impossible.

I recommend 9 effective tips to improve your self-esteem.


  • Reason #6: You’ll never truly be accepted into his circle of family and friends

No matter how friendly they act toward you, you’ll always be the other woman. You are just the other woman who drove their woman of choice away. That’s not the way you want to be looked at.


  • Reason #7: He’ll never trust or respect you

You’ll always be the other woman for him. So he knows you have a knack for ensnaring men who are taken. That makes him lose trust and respect for you.


  • Reason #8: He’ll always be ashamed of you

I don’t care if you finally manage to get his ring around your finger; the man will always look at you as the other woman and he’ll always be ashamed of you.

Wonder why he kept quiet about family day at work? Because even as his wife, you are still the other woman and he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.


  • Reason #9: You’ll always be a victim of his ex wife

Not just because you broke up their marriage. But you’ll never be rid of his ex-wife, especially if they have kids.

That’s one of the most annoying things about being the other woman. You can never be rid of the ex-wife and their kids.


  • Reason #10: You’ll miss out on the love God intended for you

This is the biggest con about being the other woman. You don’t get to meet that one special man God made for you because you were busy with another woman’s husband.

Ask yourself now. Would you want to spend a miserable life with a man who was created for another woman, or would you rather enjoy a long happy life with a man who was created specially for you?

Begin to see yourself the way God sees you. As his precious child. Claim the blessings he intended for you by checking out are you aware of God’s blessings for your life?


The final word

Maybe you think there’s something romantic or decent about being the other woman because you are watching other women do the same thing. Remember that you can never get the full picture if you are on the outside looking in.

You can’t build your happiness with a man who belongs to another woman. Refuse to stoop that low. Love and value yourself enough to want only the best in love.

God has someone special for you out there. Leave married men alone. In the meantime remain single so you can find yourself and get yourself ready for when you meet that special man.

Read these 8 reasons to celebrate being single. You’ll also want to read 6 useful tips to know yourself better.


Thank you for reading this post. Have you ever been the other woman? Or maybe you are currently the other woman? Please share with us your experiences by commenting.

9 effective tips to improve your self-esteem

If you are looking to improve your self-esteem then you’ve come to the right place. These days many people have their self-esteem threatened by the endless demands placed on them. Society now expects more from us than it used to and we are labeled failures if we can’t deliver.


A picture to improve your self-esteem


We know that self-esteem is vital in our journey of enjoying a simple healthy lifestyle. So then, how do you improve your self-esteem when the odds seem to be against you? How do you rise up from the puddle of self-worthlessness when the world seems to have knocked you down? You will need these 9 effective tips to improve your self-esteem:


  • Tip #1: Get in touch with the real you

Many people don’t know their true identities. They define themselves using names. Someone will say, “I’m Peter, or Jack, or Mary.” And that’s OK. But it’s not the true definition of who you are. You are a child of God, and that’s a title way above the VIP. It’s the ultimate highness. Knowing you are a child of God, and using that as your identity is the first tip to embrace if you want to improve your self system.

Praying is a great way to get in touch with the real you. Prayer brings out the best in us because we don’t pretend but approach God with genuineness and humility. Talk to God about your struggle and ask him to show you who you are. 

If you are struggling to pray, read these 10 easy tips to improve your prayer life.


  • Tip #2: Spend some time with yourself

Yes, alone. Many people find that scary. That’s why loneliness exists. Think of it. If you were to spend time with yourself and enjoy your own company, you wouldn’t feel lonely. You’d feel fulfilled and complete. If everyone in the world would spend time with themselves, loneliness wouldn’t exist.

Many people lack self-esteem because they can’t have a relationship with themselves. They don’t deem themselves worthy of attention from themselves. Spend time with yourself and don’t be scared to do so. When you spend time with yourself, you learn things you wouldn’t learn when you fill your time with other people’s company.

Now you can discover your true talents. Read these 10 important steps to discover and develop your talent. You’ll recognize the great things about yourself, and learn how you can improve the not-so-great ones. This will elevate your self-worth because you realize the treasure you are and what you can contribute to the world. This will definitely improve your self-esteem.


  • Tip #3: Stop relying on other people’s opinions of you

You can’t improve your self-esteem if you keep relying on people’s accolades. I used to feel low on myself if I went out into the world with a new hairstyle, or an expensive outfit, and nobody paid me a compliment. I’d secretly get mad if I gave a great presentation in class and no one had a compliment for me after class.

You can’t improve your self-esteem if you take to heart criticisms of you by other people either. A friend doesn’t like your hairstyle, or your husband made a nasty remark about your weight. Don’t let those comments put you down. Stop relying on other people’s opinions of you. Rely on God’s opinion of you and he says you are his most beloved.


  • Tip #4: Help other people

Have you ever stopped to think that the reason you struggle to improve your self-esteem is because you are too self-absorbed? You’ve made everything to be about you. It’s me me me, all the time. If you focus too much on yourself and leave no room to care for other people, then you’re going to fall short somewhere in your opinion of yourself because no one is perfect, including you.

But if you focus on helping other people, lending a hand where needed, a sympathetic shoulder to a crying friend, a plate of food to a starving kid, you get the kind of fulfillment only these actions can birth. There’s so much power in reaching beyond self to others in service, if only people could realize that. Start paying attention to this and you’ll definitely improve your self-esteem.


  • Tip #5: Embrace mistakes instead of beating yourself up over them

Mistakes present an opportunity for you to learn something. Mistakes are not evil, they are something to welcome into your life. Imagine living a life of no mistakes. How would you possibly learn?  If you want to improve your self-esteem, don’t fall into the trap of beating yourself up over your mistakes, the trap of endless regrets.

Acknowledge that everyone makes mistakes, including you. Be receptive to your mistakes and do your best to learn from them so you can be a better person tomorrow.

At the same time, refuse to let other people punish you for your mistakes. If you battled a gambling addiction but have repented and you are now working hard to commit to an addiction-free life, refuse to let people’s comments put you down. Learn to do this and improve your self-esteem.


  • Tip #6: Live in the present, not the past

This follows from Tip #5. Maybe you led a colorful past of alcohol addiction or prostitution but you’ve changed and you are now trying to live a better life. Don’t let people use your past against you. Most importantly, don’t use your own past against yourself.

Sometimes it’s not even people who attack you; you attack yourself. If you do that, you’ll always feel worthless. Forgive yourself, live in the present where you are a changed person and improve your self esteem.


  • Tip #7: Find a strong support system

This could be anyone you trust whom you confide in about your struggle with self-esteem. It could be your colleague at work, or your teacher, or pastor. Or it could be all of these people. It’s important that you find a great support system that can hold your hand when you have doubts and pull you along with love. Finding a strong support system will definitely help you improve your self-esteem.


  • Tip #8: Stop comparing yourself to others

Comparing yourself to others is a no-no if you really want to improve your self-esteem. If you are always competing with your friends and neighbors, envying their jobs, their cars, their families, their lives in general, you’ll always feel like you lack something.

You are making a huge mistake by gauging your life against the lives of others. Live your own life and enjoy it. Run your own race and don’t worry about racing your friends and colleagues down to the finishing line.


  • Tip #9: Take care of yourself

Maybe you are struggling to improve your self-esteem because you feel like you are not where you want to be in terms of health. And this goes beyond just your physical health. So exercise, eat healthy foods, read inspiring books, go back to school if you have to, take your relationship with God to the next level, cherish your relationships, etc.

Neglecting your health is a sure way to make your self-esteem suffer. So take care of yourself and improve your self-esteem.


The final word

The world we live in today can be hard on us. You are not alone if you are struggling to improve your self esteem. But use the tips above and begin working to improve your self-esteem. Don’t forget who you are. You are God’s child. An original. Don’t ever let go of that.


Thank you for reading this post.  Are you struggling with self-esteem too? Or maybe you used to but have conquered it? Please share your journey with us by commenting. What are your own tips to improve your self-esteem?


Check these out of you want more tips on how to improve your self esteem:

8 steps to improving your self-esteem by psychologytoday.com

10 tips for improving your self-esteem by reachout.com

25 killer actions to boost your self-confidence by zenhabits.net